Symphony

Cadence of Conflict: Asia, July 20, 2020

Hong Kong is seriously considering shutting itself down. Many may argue that Hong Kong is certainly shutting down, but a basic understanding of humanity says that people are resilient. China claims that doing whatever China wants inside Hong Kong is good, right, and fair, regardless of the promise not to do so until 2047. Democracies and countries with free speech have always risen up with with unstoppable strength to resist powers claiming their right to control them from outside, as China is doing.

France insulted King Henry V of England, according to legend with three tennis balls instead of promised tribute. Henry invaded and conquered. At that time, the French were spoiled and foolish; their military was no match for England because it was not disciplined.

Scotland revolted against King Edward I and won independence. At that time, the Scottish were selfless and willing to burn their own corn fields and even die; Scotland fought from desperation to not be oppressed while England’s disposition of entitlement was no match.

China claims that Hong Kongers are spoiled like the French were under Henry V. Hong Kongers claim they are desperate to escape oppression like the Scottish under Robert the Bruce. Who is right? The next few years will answer that question. But, it could go either way. Nothing is decided.

At this time, however, China is doing certain things, then Hong Kong is responding a certain way while other countries in the world respond in their ways. China believes everyone else is wrong.

Trade & Tech

Taiwan digital minister warns of China’s 5G ‘Trojan horse’ // Nikkei Asian Review

Hong Kong

Students, migrants heading to US worry about impact of Hong Kong Autonomy Act // SCMP

National security law: Beijing vows to retaliate after Donald Trump ends special treatment for Hong Kong and targets officials with sanctions // SCMP

Bankers Shocked by 45% China Tax Rate Mull Leaving Hong Kong // Bloomberg

 

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Faux Report

Nestle Claims They ‘Couldn’t Care Less’ About Waferless Kit-Kat Or Girl Who Purchased Product

kitkat

LONDON, England – 

Saima Ahmad is demanding a lifetime supply of Kit-Kats, after biting into a waferless bar last month. The 20 year-old legal student from the UK claims to be distressed, having suffered a loss “of monetary and emotional significance.”

Nestle, who makes the Kit-Kat brand, says they “could not care less” what Ahmad wants.

“We have sent her a coupon for a free Nestle product up to 2 euros, which is certainly more than she paid for it. That is the policy,” says a Nestle customer service liaison. “Why she thinks she is entitled to a lifetime supply is beyond me. Probably because she’s a law student, and she’s a pretentious bitch who thinks because she’s studying to be a lawyer, she already knows the law. Good luck fighting out law team.”

Most major brands will send out coupons when they receive complaints about defective products. Although this is often more than covers the consumer’s loss, no company offers a “if we make one mistake, you win a lifetime supply” guarantee.

Ahmad says she deserves further compensation. “I’ll find a legal loophole and they’ll give me a lifetime supply. Just wait. I have a 3.8 GPA, and that says something about me and what I’m capable of doing when I put my nose to the grindstone!”

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