Faux Report

Scientists Discover Gene That Causes ‘Psychotic’ Behavior

genes

BOSTON, Massachusetts – 

Scientists and researchers at Harvard University have discovered the gene that creates psychotic and startling, violent behavior, according to reports.

According to the report, the research team was actually looking to manipulate another set of genes in the human body, when they discovered the “psycho gene” by accident.

“The amazing thing about this gene is that it’s easily manipulated and controllable,” said Dr. Emmett Brown of Harvard. “If someone has violent or psychotic tendencies, we can find and isolate this gene in their body, and we can, essentially, remove it. It’s a miracle of modern science, if I do say so myself.”

Doctors agree that the ability to completely remove or even slightly warp the gene would mean an end to violence and erratic behavior in many individuals.

“The only problem, really, is that we have to get near this people with sharp needles and possibly scalpels to even make any changes,” said Dr. Brown. “And who the hell wants to get near a psychopath with a needle?”

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