Faux Report

Psychic Assaulted After Refusing To Divulge Winning Powerball Numbers

psychic

DOVER, Colorado –

After Sarah “Moonbeam” Morris told Ricky Murphy to “go get a fortune cookie” when he demanded Saturday’s winning Powerball numbers, she was allegedly assaulted with a crystal ball. Moonbeam says she did not see it coming, but her guides had warned her to expect a visit from someone with desperate financial troubles earlier that day.

“The messages are vague sometimes. Think of communication from the other side like a bad cell connection. It can be a bit choppy,” says Moonbeam.

The longtime psychic says Murphy came in for a reading, at first venting that he was down, and then becoming agitated when she “refused” to give him the winning Powerball numbers. He then picked up a large quartz crystal ball, used for readings, from her table, and struck her twice over the head.

“My life purpose lies in helping others find the pathway to healing and happiness through the gift of psychic and intuitive counseling- not asking my spiritual guides for lottery numbers.”

She claims her spiritual guide did give her his license plate number though, which she gave police. Police later picked Murphy up at the Grand Dump Chinese Buffet. He is being charged with aggravated assault and leaving the scene of a crime.

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